The joy a new life brings you is so overwhelming. Every moment I think of her I just smile and hope that I will be a good mom to her. I have this fear that I am going to be way over protective of her. I just love her to death I don't want anything bad to happen. I now know how our parents always felt. They only want the best for us - and that's what I want for Ava. When we made bad choices, our parents hearts sank - I know that feeling now and Ava isn't out of my stomach yet! I guess that's what getting ready to be being a parent is all about.
Things are coming along. I got all her clothes washed, and her blankets washed. Most of her things are put away to where they are going to be right now. Got the crib in the house - just waiting for Ava's father to put it up!! I can't wait to see it. I think it will really hit me then. Seeing the crib with the bedding and her clothes ready for her. All we will need is her!
I don't know how my mom did it. Giving birth to me in July! Being pregnant in 90+ heat is not fun! Luckily there are places (like work...yuck) that have air conditioning. I saw - try to enjoy what you can with the heat because come a couple months we will stuck in the cold nasty weather for 10 months! The best part of being pregnant in the summer is I get to wear my cute summer dresses that really show my stomach! That's kinda fun!
So more cleaning and organizing things to come. Waiting for the second baby shower so I can plan on what more I need to get for Ava. I know I will be missing something, but what I can get before she arrives will be nice. The great thing right now is though, is if she came today - we would only need to get the car seat. Well... Eric would have to put that crib together too!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Flips and Kicks!
More movement from the belly! I don't think Ava likes it when I am on the computer, at least when it rubs up against my stomach. I think she kicks it away! Very cute. She is moving like crazy - doing flips and kicks all the time. I smile everytime she does it. My stomach is getting a little bigger each day - gained some more weight - I think my total is up to 9 pounds now. Hoping that 3-4 is her!
So all my doctor care got moved around. I am no longer seeing my regular OB/GYN and now seeing the doctor's straight at the hospital. Because of the surgery my doctor wants to make sure things are ok and due to the fact I have had issues in April and recently with the side pain, she feels more comfortable to do that. So my mid-july sonogram picture got cancelled. I only hope that at my hospital visit I will get one. I see some people at work and on facebook talking about their pictures and visits and they are due after me. I feel like I am not getting the right treatment. I just want a picutre of my baby!
I had a great Birthday/Babyshower. I got lots of clothes for Ava and even got a new camera. My mom and Kim out did themselves and really made my day special. I couldn't have thought of a better way to spend my 30th Birthday then celebrating my new daughter.
So all my doctor care got moved around. I am no longer seeing my regular OB/GYN and now seeing the doctor's straight at the hospital. Because of the surgery my doctor wants to make sure things are ok and due to the fact I have had issues in April and recently with the side pain, she feels more comfortable to do that. So my mid-july sonogram picture got cancelled. I only hope that at my hospital visit I will get one. I see some people at work and on facebook talking about their pictures and visits and they are due after me. I feel like I am not getting the right treatment. I just want a picutre of my baby!
I had a great Birthday/Babyshower. I got lots of clothes for Ava and even got a new camera. My mom and Kim out did themselves and really made my day special. I couldn't have thought of a better way to spend my 30th Birthday then celebrating my new daughter.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
The Last Year...
One year ago I was turning 29. I weighed just over 300 pounds. And I was miserable. My life wasn't where I wanted it to be.
Today, I am days away of turning 30. I lost 110 pounds. I am happy. And my life is getting to where I want it to be.
What a difference a year can make. I am on my last week of being 29. I am 29 weeks pregnant and about to become a mother for the first time. I never thought that this time last year I would be pregnant. I went through a lot with the surgery and adjusting to a new way of life and now my life is going to be very different.
As I look back I thought this summer I would be able to go to an amusement park and get on a rollercoaster and not feel embarrassed. Well, gotta wait one more summer. I wouldn't change it for the world. I am bringing a little baby girl into the world this fall - and I will be able to bring her to the parks going forward.
People ask me if I am happy that I had the surgery. I am happy that I had the surgery because if I didn't, I wouldn't have Ava. I didn't think I would become pregnant this quick after the surgery, but God gives me what I can handle. There were things I don't like because of the surgery. I lost a lot of my hair, I still throw up at time. I get pain in my side because of things moving around. I still don't like my arms! But I am not done. I got about 30-40 pounds I think I would like to lose. I need to work on my arms. And I think my hair is growing back. Maybe not as quick as I hope, but it will happen. This is the hard part of surgery now. The last pounds to get off. The toning that needs to be done. I still have a hard time eating what I should and doing it slowly. Sometimes I just get really hungry and I forget and just eat. But then I soon remember when it comes back up.
I am happy. I fit in clothes from non-plus size stores. I am pregnant. I have more energy. I am more flexible where I can sit on the ground and cross my legs and be able to be comfortable. I am happy because when Ava is here I will be able to sit on the floor and play with her. I will have the energy to be a good mom for her. My life is for her now. I have this connection with her that I never knew about.
I am learning about what a mother is about. It's about the love you have for your children. The things you will do for them to protect them. Because of the surgery I was very low on my vitamin count. Since I got pregnant I have been taking vitamins left and right. I am concerned that I am not doing enough to make sure she is ok. That she is growing. If anything happens to her, I will know it's my fault. I want to make sure she is ok. I want to make sure she is growing good.
I was looking for to my June appointment to get another sonogram picture of Ava. But the office had to cancel. So now I have to wait till the mid-end of July. The more time that goes on the more worried I get because I don't know if she is ok. I did get to hear her heart beat the other day. Her heart was beating strong. I also know that she is active because she moves a lot. Which helps ease my worries to know that she is moving and breathing. Once I get another picture of her - I will be better.
I feel like I am all over the place. But that's my year. I lost 110 pounds. I get a daughter and my life is about to change - yet again!
Today, I am days away of turning 30. I lost 110 pounds. I am happy. And my life is getting to where I want it to be.
What a difference a year can make. I am on my last week of being 29. I am 29 weeks pregnant and about to become a mother for the first time. I never thought that this time last year I would be pregnant. I went through a lot with the surgery and adjusting to a new way of life and now my life is going to be very different.
As I look back I thought this summer I would be able to go to an amusement park and get on a rollercoaster and not feel embarrassed. Well, gotta wait one more summer. I wouldn't change it for the world. I am bringing a little baby girl into the world this fall - and I will be able to bring her to the parks going forward.
People ask me if I am happy that I had the surgery. I am happy that I had the surgery because if I didn't, I wouldn't have Ava. I didn't think I would become pregnant this quick after the surgery, but God gives me what I can handle. There were things I don't like because of the surgery. I lost a lot of my hair, I still throw up at time. I get pain in my side because of things moving around. I still don't like my arms! But I am not done. I got about 30-40 pounds I think I would like to lose. I need to work on my arms. And I think my hair is growing back. Maybe not as quick as I hope, but it will happen. This is the hard part of surgery now. The last pounds to get off. The toning that needs to be done. I still have a hard time eating what I should and doing it slowly. Sometimes I just get really hungry and I forget and just eat. But then I soon remember when it comes back up.
I am happy. I fit in clothes from non-plus size stores. I am pregnant. I have more energy. I am more flexible where I can sit on the ground and cross my legs and be able to be comfortable. I am happy because when Ava is here I will be able to sit on the floor and play with her. I will have the energy to be a good mom for her. My life is for her now. I have this connection with her that I never knew about.
I am learning about what a mother is about. It's about the love you have for your children. The things you will do for them to protect them. Because of the surgery I was very low on my vitamin count. Since I got pregnant I have been taking vitamins left and right. I am concerned that I am not doing enough to make sure she is ok. That she is growing. If anything happens to her, I will know it's my fault. I want to make sure she is ok. I want to make sure she is growing good.
I was looking for to my June appointment to get another sonogram picture of Ava. But the office had to cancel. So now I have to wait till the mid-end of July. The more time that goes on the more worried I get because I don't know if she is ok. I did get to hear her heart beat the other day. Her heart was beating strong. I also know that she is active because she moves a lot. Which helps ease my worries to know that she is moving and breathing. Once I get another picture of her - I will be better.
I feel like I am all over the place. But that's my year. I lost 110 pounds. I get a daughter and my life is about to change - yet again!
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